Happiest Boy Alive

Or at least trying to be

As you can see, I changed the name of my Substack. Some of you will get the reference, many others will not. For those not in the know, I have these three words tattooed in prime position on my right bicep. Often visible below the line of my t-shirt.

I don’t have many visible tattoos. In fact if my shorts, socks, and t-shirt are all long enough you cannot see any of them. This tattoo is also one that gets mistaken a lot. It is placed directly below a tattoo that I have which is an adaptation of a photo of my father and I together in 2005. The nature of the two of them is similar, however, it was purely because of optimal placement that these two ended up stacked.

The meaning behind the tattoo is simple. People will often ask if I am indeed the happiest boy alive, which I will reply with “no, but it’s what I aspire to be”.

I don’t want to be the strongest or the fastest. But the happiest seems like a far more noble quest. It’s also the only one of these three that isn’t rooted in comparison. I want to be the happiest me I can be, rather than trying to compare and compete with others.

I chose to use boy instead of man for a couple of reasons. It’s more playful and children are also objectively happier than adults before they have the weight of the world crushing down on them.

With that, I have decided to rename this Substack because it’s the message that I want to put out into the world. I’ve realised recently that everything that I do is to make me a better husband and father in the future. It’s the reason that I push myself to the level that I do. Why not try to extract as much joy as possible along the way.

Not all of my posts will be overtly happy. I’m currently writing one about my failure in a race I didn’t finish earlier this year. Though it’s worth remembering that there can be no happiness without sadness for comparison. If we were happy 100% of our time, it would no longer be happiness and rather our base state.

In reality it’s also a little spark of joy every time I look down at my arm. A reminder to prioritise happiness over all else. A reminder to remain present, the past and the future don’t exist. Enjoy this moment now so that maybe it will be converted into a happy memory to look back on.

That said, this is not the only tattoo on my body that serves as a reminder. In a similar fashion, I have the words Memento Mori tattooed across the base of each shin. The literal translation being ‘remember that you are mortal’. A much more morbid meaning than aspiring to be the happiest boy alive. But the message is the same. Be happy. Stay grateful. Right now is all we have.

I had a fantastic childhood. I feel very grateful to have grown up with loving parents, on the land of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. I spent all of my time outdoors with friends and alone, playing sport or exploring. All of the things that still make me happiest.

I lived in the fringes through schooling. Never quite making it into the ‘in’ group. A quiet, introvert until I found my voice in university. Though perhaps this simply coincided with the social lubrication that is alcohol.

Now, I don’t drink. I don’t need alcohol or other people to make me happy. I spent a majority of the post Covid years 2021-2022 becoming my own best friend. Going out on what people now call self-dates, which were really just a standard weekend day or night for me in London.

Don’t get my words twisted. I’m not saying that I hate company. If the opportunity to do something with someone arises, I will jump on it. Rather, I’m saying that I’d be just as comfortable to do whatever it is with only myself as company. As I’ve established recently. All of the best memories are those that are shared with others.

Finally, I think the change in title is a reminder to not take myself too seriously. I’m not a writer, I simply like writing words and sharing them with people. Therefore, nothing needs to be written. So I need to remind myself to only write about those things that provide joy or a sense of catharsis.

This piece being one of those. On the Camino Portugués I had a number of compliments on this specific tattoo. It had such an affect on two girls that they told me after the fact that they would refer to themselves as the happiest girls alive daily when they were practicing gratitude.

I have more tattoos planned which hold significant meaning to me, but I can’t express them here as I don’t want my parents to try and talk me out of them 👀

PS. Hi Mum & Dad 👋🏽 Miss you